The unseen forces

Outward support is tangible, easy to recognize, and to acknowledge. If we are fortunate, we have good friends and family who do and say things to help us. This isn’t just when times are tough, but regularly and consistently. That’s one of the reasons we all keep one another around. During the recent pandemic, we had to do things a little differently to help each other out or to connect. Raise your hand if you felt ever so grateful for technology. (I just threw my shoulder out raising my hand, did you?!)

This makes me think about Okagesama. A word taught to me last fall by a friend. I had said thanks to him for listening to me. For asking me questions. For feeling empathy.  For laughing with me, and for offering me unexpected kindness.

Okagesama, which is often used conversationally in Japan to express thanks, is the acknowledgement of unseen forces in the world which make life possible. The root of this word, kage, means “shadow.” Virtually every aspect of life is supported by unseen forces. People and energy carrying us, even when we don’t know about it. All of the actions that make our lives possible. These are the elements of our life that are in the shadow, so to see them, we have to look very deeply at our life. We have to see with more than just our eyes.

I have thought a lot this year about all the forces that have supported me through my life. When you start peeling back the layers, it is truly a miracle.  And there is no possible way that you cannot feel gratitude when you take the time to do this. Just because something is in a shadow, it does not mean that it doesn’t exist. It simply means we can’t see it because there is an absence of light. And when we bring the light of awareness to that shadow, what do we find?

Try this mental exercise.  Just for 5 minutes. Think of someone or something that you are so glad to have in your life because it makes you happy or comfortable, or it just makes your life easier. Now, how did it come to you? I mean, really, HOW did it come to YOU? Pull the curtains back. Get into those shadows. What and who is back there that brought this wonderful person or thing to you. You will not know everything. We can’t know everything. That is Okagesama. But we can shed some light.

I am so happy to have Hank, my best canine friend.  How did he come to me?

• He was found and brought to us at our mountain home.
• We had this home because the prior owner put the land on the market right when we started looking for mountain property.
• The realtor found the listing.
• We chose Virginia after noticing the area a year earlier driving home from a long weekend – we said wow, this is a pretty part of the region.
• We had worked hard to have the financial capacity to consider this property.
• We had education, jobs, drive, opportunities, good employers and colleagues, that helped us to achieve success.

And what about the person who brought Hank to us? I wouldn’t know where to start, but you can bet there is a long list of seen and unseen forces. So this is how I got Hank! It’s mind numbing. You will realize quickly that the list could go on and on. These branches keep expanding.

So, if you are ever feeling like things aren’t going the way you want them to, pause and explore one thing you are grateful for, in this way, and you will quickly see that it’s a miracle to even have what you have.

In my own way of thinking, this is an attempt to corral the unseen forces. To understand, on some level, how brilliant this Universe is. So many people, energy, and actions supporting us. Okagesama.